Hickory Grove October 15, 1863 Dear Mr Bushnell:

I sent the other day to the office to get several letters, which I heard were there– But in place of getting them– was sent word to come and read them there– as it was thought they might perhaps contain news of importance[.]

I hurried over, arrived late in the evening– my letters had all been opened, read, were given to me, with the exception of yours which was retained. By insisting I was suffered to read it– & I could see nothing disloyal. But the office (the only one that read it besides myself, thought differently– & remarked that it might cause you much trouble. Oh! How hard I begged to keep that letter, but of no use. I was overwhelmed with trouble and knew not what to do. Yes I did know there was only one way. I turned to Gods Holy Word, and opened at these words. “Whatsoever things ye desire when ye pray believe that ye receive them and ye shall have them[.]” Only believe– have faith– and the promise was mine. I sank down & asked most earnestly that, that letter might be given up to meand no harm befal you on account of it & I had fath to believe it would be done. A troubled sleep and uneasy night was mine– was up early in the morning and made another call for the letter– was politely but sternly refused– with a sad sorrowful heart I turned to start home yet trusting a faithful god– we had not however gotten far when this officer with mind changed came up handed me my dear letter, Mr Bushnell but a few moments before I had been told I could not get it[.] Oh! the goodness of god to those that trust in Him. This officer (I cannot for some reasons give his name) professed much friendship for you and for me & said that our correspondence need not cease, But requested me to tell you only to write of matters that conserned us, & not to write or hint at Politics– the War. Mr Bushnell you will of course have to write only in the way he directs. Perhaps you can speak of your health, of your business, of the weather, of books that you read, of attending church, of the near approach of winter, of this delightful season of the year, the falling leaf [[MS. illegible]]with impunity. Indeed I fear the world is getting so good, so pure that it will soon be sinful or disloyal to breathe. Free America! Hang down thy head and blush for very shame when thou thinkest of thy sister countries beyond the might Ocean!

The letter of which I speak is the one of the 5th Oct I could myself see nothing in it to give offence[.] It was only to me sensible, pretty, affectionate & full of interest. You meant no disloyalty, it is far from you to do anything against our government– the government which has and is protecting us. Dear Mr Bushnell I could not be deprived of so great a comfort as hearing from you & you must continue to write me evry two weeks atleast– to let your letters reach Calhoun evry other when I can send to the office and have them taken out when called. I think matters are arranged now so there will be no more trouble. Let us both though weigh evry word we write. I have no idea at any other office your letter would have been noticed or any disloyalty thought of. You do not know how much I have to tell you; How many questions to ask, How much to talk about. It seems you are so far away[.] How pleasant and dear the society of loved ones. Very late intelligence from Ohio– our relations & friends all well How cheering– How consoling!– They attribute their lives, their health, and prosperity to the Prayers of “Loved ones at home”– send their kindest regards best wishes etc to you. I should love to see the little Mary , Archie & Millie too, & your Brothers[.] I am glad they are getting along well and you can hear from them. I have thought so much about you within the last few days may god bless you and others– shield you from the storm and suffer us all to meet soon.

You can speak of having the Blues or not having just as you may hear good news for or against our government. I can understand. I wrote you the other day by mail Hope you will get the letter– think you will[.]

Ma & Carrie send their love & rejoice at my good luck in getting your letter I fear that many of us will not have sweet tempers when the war is over. We have so much to vex so much to disturb and so much to know that sickens our hearts.

Mr Bushnell you must really excuse bad writing[.] The paper that we get in the towns is so rough that one can scarcely write. I shall be anxious to know whither or not you get this. Pleas write as soon as you do[.]

good Bye with much Love[.] aff yrs Eugenia